Is your Relationship Ready for a Baby?

Most people who are childless do not realize what an impact a child will make on their lives, unless they have close friends who have recently had a baby and have seen for themselves the profound changes that occur both individually and within a relationship. While no one really knows whether a relationship is ready for the arrival of a baby, there are some warning signs that may indicate now is not the right time to be bringing a child into the world. Obviously the biggest issue arising when a couple is contemplating having a child is their financial status. Babies are expensive (formula, doctor check-ups, clothes, diapers) and a couple who is experiencing financial difficulties should postpone having a baby until their income condition is more stable.

Issues to Think About

If your relationship is experiencing any of these concerns, having a baby may not be a good idea:

• trust/jealousy issues

• relationship is less than a year old

• either partner working on a degree

• frequent arguments about money

• addiction/alcohol

• physical or emotional abuse inflicted by a partner

Having to constantly move is also not conducive to the upbringing of a child. If you and your partner, for one reason or another, are having problems with finding a place to live or have had to move several times over the past few years, having a child is a priority which should definitely be delayed.

Outside Pressures

Pay attention to your relationship first and don't let outside pressure influence your decision to have a child. Just because "everyone" is having a baby or your parents are constantly nagging you about that grandchild they want doesn't mean you have to give in to these pressures. Also do not think a baby is going to strengthen a relationship that may seem to be failing. If you have any doubts about your partner's fidelity, emotional commitment or sense of responsibility, you should realize that having a baby will only exacerbate any problems that are currently arising. Relationship issues that are serious may need the intervention of a professional marriage counselor before the decision to have a baby, can be rationally made. The healthiness of relationships are built on love, trust, respect and responsibility for the other's well-being. Bringing a child into a well-balanced relationship will empower it. Bring a child into an unhealthy relationship will usually only complicate it.

Buying newborn supplies midway through a pregnancy help alleviate stress and gives you time to remember in additional items you will need, such as Huggies wipes scented.